One day,

I pulled this gas tank from an old Chevy. I wanted to blow it up, so I did. What I didn't think about was all the, you know, little bits of metal that were gonna fly in every direction. And I almost killed myself. I woke up in this hospital. And this doctor was like, 
"Son".
And I said, "Don't call me son, you fucking cunt".
And then, he was, like, "You blew off your nut".
I just lost my nut like that. I went fucking crazy.
I assaulted a nurse or a doctor, I don't remember, but I got arrested, I went to juvie. All I could think about was my fucking nut, man. I'm missing a nut. 
What am I gonna do? I had to go looking for it, right? So I busted out of juvie and I went searching, couldn't find my nut. 
Well, there was this one night, I was sitting there and I was taking a shit, I was looking at my balls and staring at this little piece of flabby sack... where my left nut used to be. And then, I saw my right nut for the first time. I was like, 
"Fuck, man! My nut!
"Look, I have... I still have a nut". Right?
It's a good nut. It works. God or the fucking devil
or whoever the fuck it is, you know, he left me with one good nut. I still have a fucking nut and it works, and my fucking dick works, too.
Okay, you lost your wife. And you lost your mom. I lost my nut.

-hesher-